He was very intelligent and was the reason behind much of human science. It fit perfectly, and the skirt was a swirl of intricate pleats.

“I’m a man of the cloth. —George Brown. Bartender: You need to buy a drink first. Back home, he pulls on the starter rope a few times with no results.

A Strange Proximity Stage Presence, Failure, and the Ethics

Thank God!

The... My granddaughter's husband was complaining about how spellcheck changes the meaning of e-mails when an Air Force officer told him this story: He’d sent a message to 300 of his personnel addressed to “Dear Sirs and Ma’ams.” It was received as “Dear Sirs and Mamas.” —Phyllis Howard.

When my local barista handed me my change, one coin stood out.

One of my wife’s third graders was wearing a Fitbit watch, which prompted my wife to ask, “Are you tracking your steps?” “No,” said the little girl.

“I’m sorry, you have the wrong number,” I said.

—Bob McCord.

I mean... Ι appreciate that my friends are doing their best to cheer me up after my diagnosis, but I’ve heard so many cancer jokes today, that if I get to hear just tumor I’ll really get mad.

“Look at that. Scene: With a patient in my medical exam room Me: How old are your kids?

Cuz i cant get u outta my head and its killing me. The game between the Sox and the Indians was in the ninth inning, with the Sox ahead by a run. Surgeon 1: I just don't understand it. You have plenty of time.” —Jack Girard.

Officials praise the regime for finding common grounds with the US.

The wife undresses and says, "25 years ago, when you first saw me naked, what were you thinking?" —Submitted by Alex Del Bene, Could a ... ... librarian be called a bookkeeper? “I wear this for Mommy so she can show Daddy when he gets home.” —James Avery. Customer: Do you have jogging shorts?

“I’m... My husband and I were daydreaming about what we would do if we won the lottery. The first day on the job, he opens his lunch box and mumbles, “Oh no, peanut butter!” The next day, “Peanut butter again!” This goes on for days, until another worker says, “Why don’t you ask your wife to make a different lunch?” Joe replies, “I’m not married.

Thinking no one could hear me as I loaded a UPS tractor trailer, I began to whistle.

Is this a problem?” —Carol Harper. The doctor did some tests and discovered a brain tumor.

The doctor did some tests and discovered a brain tumor. “Is this the salon near the fire station?”... On the way to meet my husband at a restaurant, I realized that I didn’t have my phone and immediately panicked.

I was 12 years old at the time and at Emory Hospital in Atlanta, Georgia. Here’s my favorite dad joke, with me as the dad: Every Sunday on the way to church, we would have to stop at a railroad crossing.

“Turns out we were supposed to shoot around it, not hit it.” —Patrick McSherry. How fast were you planning on going?

It was my first night caring for an elderly patient. — I don’t know... but I remember a Coca-Cola ad from 1998, if you are interested. Mom admitted she didn’t have anything particular in mind, and the pair started chatting. —Stephanie Chapman, When I was a proofreader, I shared with my coworkers this example to illustrate how writing can skew based on gender: A professor wrote on the blackboard, “Woman without her man is nothing.” The students were then instructed to insert the proper punctuation.

After a few weeks, move up to ten-pound potato bags. ( well, he could hardly be physically abusive could he?).

She discovered that Mike O’Malley was leaving for America and asked Mike to look for Timmy and tell him to write to her.

When I was 12, he took me to a Chicago White Sox game with a group from a local tavern.

—Constance Normandeau, There's a guy in town who walks around talking to himself using only figurative language. “What’s this for?” I asked.

A big list of human brain jokes!

I was really getting into it when a coworker in the next trailer poked his head in. After a health scare, I hugged my wife and whispered, “If something happens to me, the presents in my closet are yours.” She whispered back, “If anything happens to you,... Our boatswain's mate was a smoker who would toss his matches overboard. The reason why was so I could get a tumor out of my eyeball, which was usually a sign of cancer in people in their 50s-60s, not when they are 12.

He saw my phone on the couch at home and brought it with him. My dad was not a jokester, but his fun side did come out once in a while. Why TV News Is Like Junk Food and Trump Is the Doritos HuffPost Then one day, he surprised us all when he popped a cigarette in his mouth and produced an expensive lighter from his pocket. Let's get tumor people.

—Mimi Wright. in Germany we took part of a brain, put it in another man, and in 4 weeks he is looking for a job." My dad used to sing little ditties. The first day on the job, he opens his lunch box and mumbles, “Oh no,... One night, the phone rang, and Dad answered it.

I grew up hearing my dad tell a joke about a Mrs. Dunn, whose son, Timmy Dunn, had left Ireland for America, never to be heard from again. Thinking no one could hear me as I loaded a UPS tractor trailer, I began to whistle. It’s no wonder why so many never learned to use it.

In honor of all your middle children out there, here are 10 painfully honest ... 10 But at the end of the day, you know exactly where you stand.hellogiggles.com, 9 Aug 2019 ... For National Middle Child Day, you'll recognize these annoying, and sometimes surprisingly advantageous things about growing up in ...www.rd.com, See more ideas about Middle child, Children, Middle child day.

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